The following first-person account was written recently for USA Field Hockey by Watertown, CT native Brianna Nolan – a senior field hockey player at Eastern Connecticut State University. Nolan and her teammates were among thousands of collegiate athletes nationwide who recently had their fall seasons pulled out from under them by the novel coronavirus.

Nolan is a three-year member of the field hockey program and a starting midfielder in 2018 and 2019 who came to Eastern after playing three sports for four years at Watertown High School. A three-sport senior captain at Watertown, Nolan earned All-State honors twice in field hockey and was all-league twice in field hockey and twice in the high jump in track & field and graduated among the program's all-time field hockey leaders in scoring.

In her high school athletic career, Nolan was also named Rookie-of-the-Year in field hockey and track, sophomore MVP in track, MVP in field hockey and Coach's Award recipient in track as a senior and was a member of the 4x100 record-setting relay as a junior. Academically, Nolan was a member of the national and world language honor societies in each of her final three years.

Academically, Nolan is a high honors student at Eastern and has been a member of the NFHCA National Academic Team and Little East Conference All-Academic Team each year. In a 400 level Spanish Literature class this fall, she is on target to perhaps attain the highest grades in the class despite the fact that she is the only one of her classmates who did not grow up in a Spanish-speaking household.

During breaks in the academic schedule, she also gains valuable classroom experience by serving as a paraprofessional both in Willimantic and in her hometown, and has also worked in the Natchaug School After-School Program.  At Eastern, she is a member of the Education Club and La Mesa de Español Spanish-speaking club and this fall was involved in a racial justice workshop.

This spring, she will be working toward completing her B.S. Degree in Spanish a year early, while simultaneously beginning work on her M.S. Degree in Elementary Education. She plans to close out her field hockey career as a graduate student at Eastern in the fall of 2021 and is planning for a career as a first grade teacher.

Since the spring of her freshman year, Nolan has served as a student-worker in Eastern's Sports Information Office as a member of the SID event staff while also handling a variety of office responsibilities.
 
By Brianna Nolan '21
 

 
When last spring's intercollegiate season was cancelled soon after it began, we felt terrible for the spring season athletes; at the same time, we never imagined it would impact our fall sports season which was nearly a half-year away.
 
However, as the spring turned to summer and the fall season approached, the light didn't seem so bright anymore. Back at home with our families last summer -- away from our teammates -- hope slowly faded and sadness began to set in. Still, few of us were fully prepared the dreadful email which eventually came from our coach, effectively cancelling our fall season as we had come to know it. (My first inclination was to delete the email and pretend it wasn't happening.)

Throughout the rest of the summer, we had weekly Zoom meetings in order to support and encourage each other to keep practicing and training. Ultimately, we worked so hard for a season that did not happen.
 
Eventually, at the end of October, things started to brighten when news began circulating about a possible spring field hockey season. Could this really happen for us? I didn't know whether to be excited and optimistic or to be cautious and cynical, because I didn't want to be let down again; however, in all honesty, none of us really know fully what to expect in the coming months... so why not maintain hope?
 
Even with hope, anxiety continues to plague me. We all worked so hard to be collegiate field hockey players, so it seems unfair how one thing can take the game we love away from most of us.

 

At this point – eight months into the pandemic -- there are still more questions than answers: Will the game ever be the same? Will we be as close with all of our teammates? What will the first game back feel like? Despite these unanswered and unnerving questions, it's a certainty that when and if our season resumes, we are all going to feel a lot like freshmen again and experience something brand new.
 
Recently, I decided that it was time to stop thinking about the fall season that we had lost -- we were limited to practice and physical conditioning throughout most of the fall -- and hope for a spring season that we hope is to come. Of course, we all want nothing more than to put on our shin guards again, do a pre-game cheer, and a post-game celebration, so let's remember what these things feel like and do our part to make this the outcome in the spring.
 
When it returns, the game may be a little different than the one in which we have become accustomed. Instead of handshakes during the coin flip, it may be waves, instead of the whistle in the referees' mouth there may be some type of hand squeeze whistle clenched in their hand to, and instead of a teammate handing you a water bottle as you come off the field breathless and parched, it may be hand sanitizer and wipes first.
 
No matter what new regulations and rules are to come, however, our passion and love of the game will not change. Even with masks, we can still warm up with our usual passing partner, we can still cheer as loud as we can after a goal or great save, and we can still make a game-winning play. 
 
And of course, we will still get frustrated over shooting wide left of the cage in the last two seconds of the game or a heart-breaking loss that is difficult to shake, but now we should remember to take a little time to savor every part of the game. Without those frustrating moments, we could never have the overtime victory, the conference championship, and the post-game celebrations with our best friends. Both aspects – the good and the bad -- are a part of the game that we would do anything to play again.
 
So, let's take a minute next season to appreciate and cherish every last minute of it all. Let's not live in the past, but rather, be hopeful and thankful for all of the opportunities we did have and for all of the new ones to come.